Vacation Get-Away

Ever been totally stressed out? Have a “To Do” list longer than your life expectancy? Need a vacation? That’s me most of the time. Recently I found myself on a two-night, three-day, all-inclusive getaway. Food included, transportation to the facility, excellent service, parting gifts and a room for two.

My roommate left with stitches and a gall bladder and I received staples and an appendix. I hadn’t expected a mini-vacation to the local hospital to have unnecessary organs removed. I’m not even sure that I really needed an appendectomy. Compared to having four children, the pain’s not that bad.

But after showing up in the emergency room with a husband and four kids who thought they were on a field trip, who then proceeded to place “Get Well” stickers the nurses gave them on every piece of expensive diagnostic equipment in the hospital and play “peek-a-boo” with the screens of unexpecting, half-dressed patients, I think the surgical staff figured this lady could benefit from being put to sleep, drugged and spending a night or two away from that bunch. They were right.

Except for the pain, scar tissue, and insurance bill, I actually enjoyed myself. Do you think it’s a bit desperate to consider a trip to the hospital a vacation? My friends visited me with reading material and gifts. I did get woken every fours hours, but that’s nothing new and instead of me getting out of bed to check on crying kids, nurses were coming to check on me. I took an uninterrupted shower, talked on the phone and enjoyed a nap.

I’ve never been in the hospital before except to deliver a child, not an appendix, so I did experience this uneasy feeling of “where’s my newborn?” and every time a nurse came in my room I was anticipating it was time to breastfeed.

My husband admitted a newfound appreciation for my mommy skills, which only lasted about a week, my children were amazed that you can staple a person just like a cardboard box and the whole family was really nice to me for about three hours when I came home. And although I don’t suggest major surgery as an alternative to your dream vacation, every time I drive by the hospital I wonder if they might let me spend the night just for fun.

Leave a Comment